Friday, October 27, 2006

Modern Day Cain & Abel

Then the Lord asked Cain, "Where is your brother Abel?"

Cain answered, "I don't know: Am I my brother's keeper?"

God said, "What have you done? I hear the voice of your brother's blood crying to me from the ground. Now you will be cursed on the earth soaked with your brother's blood which was drawn by your own hand."


I knew it was going to happen some day. After all, hamsters don't live forever. I just didn't expect it to happen quite like this.

I got 2 hamster brothers for Thomas for his birthday back in August. Hamsters, as you know, do not have long lifespans. They are also vegetarian, and have wicked sharp teeth they use to eat things like dried corn and seeds. They also use those teeth for defense. Anyone who has been bit by a hamster will tell you- they are sharp, and quick, and it hurts!
So.
There we were last night.
It was time to clean the hamster cage. Thomas reached in and pulled one out. I reached in to get the other one.
I found him pretty quickly, but something was wrong.
HE HAD NO HEAD.

EWWWWWWWWWW

I tried to hide it from Thomas, and told him that the hamster was dead. He asked me how I knew, "Trust me, son", I said. "He's dead". After all, the skin and fur on his head was completely removed from his skull, his jaw (with 1/2 inch long incisors- no wonder that bite is wicked!) was crushed, and his brain was just laying there. Until I saw his tail, I couldn't even tell that bit of blood and guts used to be his head and not some other part of his tiny body.

Thomas was in tears. He's yelling at the surviving hamster (whom I have now nicknamed Cain instead of his given name, Hissy): HOW COULD YOU DO THAT? HE WAS YOUR BROTHER! NOW HE'S.. HE'S... DEAD! I SHOULD KILL YOU! And then there was this question, "Mommy, since he killed his brother, will he go to heaven or or or the other place (cus he knows he's not supposed to say 'hell', lol) when he dies?"
I told him that it depended on why he killed his brother.

I believe this happened because they were out of food. Thomas is still getting used to taking care of the hamsters (especially since he only has then every other week, when he's at my house and not his Dad's house), and I think they simply ran out of food. They got into a fight, and one drew blood... and kept going.

Of course he wanted to have a funeral, but it was dark, cold, and rainy. I told him I would look for a box to put him in and I'd bury him later this weekend. The only small box I could find was my empty GODIVA box from my recent trip to New York. OMG.. I cannot believe I'm going to bury a decapitated hamster in a gold Godiva box. There's just something not right about that.

During all of this, Kevin was in the bathtub, asking to be washed so he can get out of the tub. "I can't Kevin.. Having a bit of a PROBLEM here... You'll have to wait". Good Lord.

Thomas is crying about the dead hamster, and about the fact that he was murdered by his brother, and Kevin is begging to get out of the tub, and I'm trying to keep the peace, hide a bloody mess, and clean the cage. Jesus H. Christ in a Chicken Basket.

So.
Now I have a headless hamster taped up in a Godiva box sitting on my kitchen counter, awaiting proper Christian burial; a traumitized son, wondering what would drive someone/something to do that to their brother, and also wondering how God will treat the murderer; and a remorseful, murdering furball who currently resides in a Hamster Taj Mahal...alone.

*sigh*

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