Saturday, September 29, 2007


"RIGHT THERE, PILGRIM" is my new favorite traffic sign.

LMFAO.. how creative is that??? Get people to actually pay attention to road signs by making them funny enough to make you want to read it. TOO cool.

Maybe we could put up some "JOHN" signs where we normally see deer crossing.

Or maybe "There's NO PARKING baby... NO PARKING on the dance floor"

Perhaps a new speed limit sign proclaiming "I CAN'T DRIVE... 55"

What about a series of "Yield" signs, with "Curve", "Net", "Gross", "High", "Dividend", "Tax Equivalent", "Annual", and "Cummulative". That one may go over better in New York, around the stock exchanges. lol (sorry- just a bit of finance dork humor there)

American Terrorists

Iran's Parliament has decided to declare the CIA and the US Army "terrorist organizations".

I'm good with that.

Because if Iran considers our CIA and Army aggressive and strong enough to threaten their safety... I'm perfectly content to accept that label. CIA spokesman Paul Gimigliano apparently agrees: "There are some things that don't even deserve comment. This is one."


Friday, September 28, 2007

My Dad's Bruce Lee

Maybe some day, as an adult, my boys will write a song about me. Hopefully it goes more like:
We're Thomas & Kevin and we're 5 and my Mom's the Bionic Woman
Drives me around in her way-cool Kia Sportage

instead of:
We're Thomas & Kevin and we're 5 and my Mom's Mommy Dearest
Drives me around in the backseat like we don't matter

I'm Luke, I'm 5, and my Dad's Bruce Lee.

(Thanks Doc. Sometimes we all need to stop, relax, and remember that the thing our kids want, and need, the most is time with their parents. It doesn't matter if you give them the world- if you don't give them your time and love, it won't matter. God, I miss my kids.)

Thursday, September 27, 2007

I don't know what to say about this

... other than OHMYGOD............

A 5-year-old kindergarten student was suspended for three days and Child Protective Services is investigating how he learned sexual behavior after a teacher interrupted one boy performing a sex act on another.

The teacher thought that both 5-year-olds were taking too long in the bathroom when she interrupted the act.

And then, when the victim's family and the school tried to move the aggressor to a different school, they were told the district would not accomodate their "request". Request??? That's not a REQUEST, that's a REQUIREMENT. They did, however, offer to move the VICTIM to a different school. How fucked up is that? The district won't remove the offender from the classroom or the school, but yet have *NO* problem offering to move the victim to a different school? I'd go ballistic!

My next thought sickens me as much as what happened in that bathroom at school:
How in the HELL did that poor little boy learn how to perform sex acts!???!!!

Jesus... Christ...

I'll be right back...!

My business trips aren't usually as "interesting" as this most recent one, so I thought I'd share a few items.

1. When TSA looks at your driver's license and boarding pass, and says "ohhh.. ohhh my... um.. ohhhh" it's NOT A GOOD THING. Traveling by air with an expired driver's license will get you the "special treatment" by TSA- full pat-down, sniffer treatment, and carry-on inspection. JOY!

2. Did you know that when you see signs on hotel rooms that say "film preview here"; "film viewing here"; and "hospitality room" could be an indication that something rather odd is going on. Like an Adult Film Convention. Of course, that does explain the first guest I saw at the resort, who was wearing a t-shirt with "I'd Fuck Me" on the front.

3. Heartburn that lasts longer than a day is not heartburn.

4. Getting escorted off of an airplane by paramedics is REALLY embarrassing.

5. When the patient says "why are we going this way, when the hospital is way over THERE"... EMT's tend to say "um. I'll be RIGHT BACK" and then they disappear to the front of the bus.

6. When the ambulance driver stops on the side of the road to figure out where he is, the EMT in the back usually looks at you, and then says "I'll be RIGHT BACK" before he disappears to the front. Again.

7. See #6. AGAIN. (yes, he really did turn around THREE TIMES before finally finding the hospital)

8. Keeping your sense of humor during stressful times is very helpful. I'm sure that some day I will look back on the incredibly lost ambulance driver and laugh hysterically. I will.. won't I?

9. I'm allergic to iodine. Never knew that before last night. But when I showed the nurse the hives on my leg and redness on my chest, and she said "I'll be RIGHT BACK"... I figured there was a problem.

10. When injected, iodine give you a really weird taste in your mouth, makes you incredibly warm, and makes you feel like you have to pee. Really bad.

11. Isopropyl alcohol tastes exactly how it smells- nasty.

12. Isopropyl alcohol can be magically transported to your taste buds when injected into your iv. Very weird. And nasty. (see #8)

13. Breathing without pain is a luxury we take for granted.

14. I will never take breathing without pain for granted again.

15. Having pleurisy is painful, but at least the other diagnosis didn't come true- a blood clot in my lung.

16. Pain meds make me really sleepy, but not as loopy as iv Benadryl does.

In case you haven't noticed, I heard "I'll be RIGHT BACK" a LOT last night. At least 4 or 5 times, maybe more. I'd laugh right now, thinking about the past two days, but it hurts too much to laugh so I think I'll just go to sleep and dream about laughing instead.

Saturday, September 22, 2007

Catching Up

It's been a while since I've posted any pictures, so I figger.. it's time! Consider this our summer vacation slideshow: Louisville Zoo, indoor water park, Gatlinburg Aquarium, Smokey Mountains, Forbidden Caverns, gem mining, camping, baseball, swimming, ATV panty races at the county fair, archery, MRE's, football, birthdays and a Kentucky National Guard Armory. Man... no wonder I'm worn out. I need a vacation from my summer vacations!


Disclaimer: This will make more sense for those of you who listen to the "Bob and Tom Show".
This past week I was helping my son study for his spelling test. Some were "sound alike" words, like "their" and "there", so I was saying the word, and then followed it up with a sentence for context.
This worked fine until I got to the last word: flute.
The first thing that came to my head was "Flute: Play yo' flute, Greg... Greg's a flute man. Flute yo' flute, Greg!"

My son's response? "Who's Greg?"

Friday, September 21, 2007

Earning the freedom to get an education

Tater (my favorite AF pilot) sends me tres kewl emails from time to time. Some are videos, some are jokes, and some are stories. This one was just too meaningful to pass up as a post. And it's a true story. Snopes has more, and I encourage you click the link to read, as Tater put it, "the rest of the story".

Back in September of 2005, on the first day of school, Martha Cothren, a
social studies school teacher at Robinson High School in Little Rock ,
did something not to be forgotten. On the first day of school, with the
permission of the school superintendent, the principal and the building
supervisor, she removed all of the desks out of her classroom. When the
first period kids entered the room they discovered that there were no

Looking around, confused, they asked, 'Ms. Cothren, where're our desks?'
She replied, 'You can't have a desk until you tell me what you have done
to earn the right to sit at a desk.'They thought, 'Well, maybe it's our

'No,' she said.

'Maybe it's our behavior.'

She told them, 'No, it's not even your behavior.'

And so, they came and went, the first period, second period, third
period. Still no desks in the classroom. By early afternoon television
news crews had started gathering in Ms. Cothren's classroom to report
about this crazy teacher who had taken all the desks out of her room.

The final period of the day came and as the puzzled students found seats
on the floor of the desk less classroom, Martha Cothren said,
'Throughout the day no one has been able to tell me just what he/she has
done to earn the right to sit at the desks that are ordinarily found in
this classroom. Now I am going to tell you.'At this point, Martha
Cothren went over to the door of her classroom and opened it.
Twenty-seven (27) U.S. Veterans, all in uniforms, walked into that
classroom, each one carrying a school desk. The Vets began placing the
school desks in rows, and then they would walk over and stand alongside
the wall. By the time the last soldier had set the final desk in place
those kids started to understand, perhaps for the first time in their
lives, just how the right to sit at those desks had been earned.

Martha said, 'You didn't earn the right to sit at these desks. These heroes did
it for you. They placed the desks here for you. Now, it's up to you to
sit in them. It is your responsibility to learn, to be good students, to
be good citizens. They paid the price so that you could have the freedom
to get an education. Don't ever forget it.'


Thursday, September 20, 2007

Hope Rides Eternal

Sgt. Eddie Jeffers is home. Home in heaven.

And those of us left on Earth cry, and mourn his loss.

If you're not sure why I'm crying, go read this, and I'll pass you the Puffs. Here's an excerpt- maybe you'll recognize it, because when he wrote it in February, it was linked on blogs all over the place.

Terrorists cut the heads off of American citizens on the internet...and there is no outrage, but an American soldier kills an Iraqi in the midst of battle, and there are investigations, and sometimes soldiers are even jailed...for doing their job.

It is absolutely sickening to me to think our country has come to this. Why are we so obsessed with the bad news? Why will people stop at nothing to be against this war, no matter how much evidence of the good we've done is thrown in their face? When is the last time CNN or MSNBC or CBS reported the opening of schools and hospitals in Iraq? Or the leaders of terror cells being detained or killed? It's all happening, but people will not let up their hatred of President Bush. They will ignore the good news, because it just might show people that Bush was right.
America has lost its will to fight. It has lost its will to defend what is right and just in the world. The crazy thing of it all is that the American people have not even been asked to sacrifice a single thing. It's not like World War II, where people rationed food and turned in cars to be made into metal for tanks. The American people have not been asked to sacrifice anything. Unless you are in the military or the family member of a servicemember, its life as usual...the war doesn't affect you.

But it affects us. And when it is over and the troops come home and they try to piece together what's left of them after their service...where will the detractors be then? Where will the Cindy Sheehans be to comfort and talk to soldiers and help them sort out the last couple years of their lives, most of which have been spent dodging death and wading through the deaths of their friends? They will be where they always are, somewhere far away, where the horrors of the world can't touch them. Somewhere where they can complain about things they will never experience in their lifetime; things that the young men and women of America have willingly taken upon their shoulders.

We are the hope of the Iraqi people. They want what everyone else wants in life: safety, security, somewhere to call home. They want a country that is safe to raise their children in. Not a place where their children will be abducted, raped and murdered if they do not comply with the terrorists demands. They want to live on, rebuild and prosper. And America has given them the opportunity, but only if we stay true to the cause and see it to its end. But the country must unite in this endeavor...we cannot place the burden on our military alone. We must all stand up and fight, whether in uniform or not. And supporting us is more than sticking yellow ribbon stickers on your cars. It's supporting our President, our troops and our cause.

Right now, the burden is all on the American soldiers. Right now, hope rides alone. But it can change, it must change. Because there is only failure and darkness ahead for us as a country, as a people, if it doesn't.

Let's stop all the political nonsense, let's stop all the bickering, let's stop all the bad news and let's stand and fight!

Isn't that what America is about anyway?

h/t to SK, who lead me to Chuck, who sent me to Gazing. I'm still in shock.

Interesting times we live in....

Trying to impress his ex-girlfriend, an extremely drunk and stupid man puts a flippin' RATTLESNAKE in his MOUTH. Not surprisingly, the snake fought back and bit the man's tongue, nearly killing him. Well... we almost got to clean up the gene pool.

What is it with Texas mothers doing horrendous things to their children????? Jesus H. Christ. Alysha Green coaxed her three children, ages 7, 5, and 3, into a closet, doused them with gasoline telling them it was a "new game", and then set them on fire. Neighbors pulled the kids from the house and put out the flames with water hoses, while the 7 year old was screaming "WHY MOMMY? WHY MOMMY? WHY DID YOU DO THIS TO ME????" God... that poor baby. The 3 year old died a day later; the other two daughters are still in a Texas hospital. What in the HELL would make anyone do such a thing!!! Horrified. Simply horrified.

Iranian President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad had the nerve to believe that the US would actually allow him to walk the grounds of the World Trade Centers.... Fortunately, New York denied the request.
White House spokesman Gordon Johndroe said Wednesday that an Ahmadinejad visit to Ground Zero "is a matter for the city of New York, but it seems more than odd that the president of a country that is a state sponsor of terror would visit Ground Zero."
Damn straight, Gordo. Mahmoud has NO business stepping foot on that site.

Murtha proves himself to be an EX-Marine again. How that sorry excuse for a man got re-elected is just BEYOND me.

Jesse Jackson has accused Barack Obama of "acting white" in the case of the Jena 6. So far, no one has stepped up to the plate to say that Jesse is "acting ghetto black" in his attack on Obama. I guess it's just so damn obvious that it doesn't need to be said.

And speaking of Obama.... if bin Laden is ready to declare war on Pakistani President Pervez Musharraf... I'd say we should count Pakistan amongst our closest friends. Any enemy of bin Laden is a friend of mine; any friend of bin Laden is an enemy of mine. I guess that makes Obama my enemy, eh?

And finally... this story is Rather asinine. What a crybaby.

Tuesday, September 18, 2007

The Flying Moonbat

Lots has been said about Sally Fields' Emmy award speech, but this is my favorite:

Yeah, that's why they bleeped you, Sally. Whatever happened to "You like me. You really, really like me?" This time it was "If the mothers ruled the world, there would be no [GD] wars in the first place."

And here I was thinking that it was those mother-[fill-in-the-blank] who flew planes into the World Trade Center that started a war.

Wrong interpretation of "mothers," I guess.

Mike Straka... I think I'm in love.

Tuesday, September 11, 2007


You'll hear that word a lot today. Do you remember when??????

Of course you do- we all do.
We remember:
- the horror of realizing the first crash into the WTC wasn't an accident
- seeing flaming- and not flaming- bodies flying to the ground from upper floors
- the Pentagon in flames- the phrase "Let's Roll"
- the shock of seeing not one, but two WTC towers fall
- ash-covered New York residents, roaming the streets
- the eery shrill tone of the firefighter's locator beacons
- crying... a lot
- the song "Proud to be an American" became our battle cry
- flags waving from every house, every store, and every car- or so it seemed
- vowing vengeance
- planes grounded for days, except for military jets and cargo planes
- the fear of flying in post-9/11 times
- feeling helpless, yet not without hope
- watching the TV for weeks on end, hoping and praying for survivors to be found
- realizing that America wasn't as safe as we thought it was
- believing that Saddam and Osama would both be found and killed
- discovering what it meant to be a radical islamic fundamentalist
- asking how could anyone do something like this in the name of their "god"

Yeah. We remember a lot about 9/11/01 and the days that followed. But we've forgotten a lot too. Unfortunately, many Americans- including government officials- have forgotten what it means to be at war. They've forgotten that living in a war zone will eventually lead to unavoidable civilian deaths. They've forgotten the vow of vengeance we all made at day. They've forgotten how to honor our military. They've forgotten that we have a 100% voluntary military who are dedicated to completing their mission. They've forgotten that re-enlistment rates are soaring. They've forgotten that supporting our troops includes supporting their mission. They've forgotten how to say "Thank you for defending our freedom, and promoting freedom around the world."

It's our mission now to make sure that we not only remember, but we also remember that far too many have forgotten. We must make them remember. We must make them forge on.

We must win.

Friday, September 07, 2007

Thy name shall be....DIPSHIT!

ESCATAWPA, Miss. — A man trying to call a news station to complain about not getting a FEMA trailer after Hurricane Katrina accidentally dialed 911 and was charged with making methamphetamine after police arrived, authorities said.

Curtiss Randall Coleman was trying to get the number for Biloxi's WLOX-TV on Wednesday just before the 6 p.m. newscast, investigators said. He misdialed when trying to reach directory information and called 911 instead of 411.

When he hung up on the emergency dispatcher, the Jackson County Sheriff's Department was sent to the home to see if anyone was in need of assistance.

Deputies said that when they arrived at Coleman's house, no one answered the door. Officers broke in and allegedly found a methamphetamine lab.

Excuse me while I laugh my f'in head off....
Whaa whaaa whaaa... I didn't get my free FEMA meth lab... whaa whaa whaa


Thursday, September 06, 2007

More on Brenda Nesselroad-Slaby

The Today Show did a segment on her case this morning, and I can't say I've ever seen Matt Lauer more flabergasted. During his live interview with Clermont County prosecutor, Don White, Matt stumbled over his words, trying to come up with something to say other than "YOU'VE GOT TO BE KIDDING ME.. HOW CAN THIS NOT BE A CRIME!?!??!!!"

I watched the interview with my 7 year-old, who wasn't quite sure what the story was about. I told him that a lady left her 2 year-old daughter in the car all day while she was at work, and the baby died. I asked him if he thought she should get in trouble, and he immediately said, "YEAH! I mean, Mommy... she KILLED her BABY! She needs to be in JAIL!"

I told him the story was about the fact that she was NOT in jail, and wasn't getting in trouble at all for the crime.
His reply... "I don't get it, Mommy. Michael Vick hurt some dogs, and HE'S getting in trouble- why isn't she? Will she get in trouble the next time she does something wrong?"

"Well, honey... I don't know. This isn't the first time she left the baby alone in the car- even the police warned her against it".

He said, "You've GOT to be KIDDING ME! They told her, and told her, and told her... and she STILL didn't listen!?!!!? She needs to be in jail, Mommy."
What do you say to that, other than "I know, baby. I think so too, and I don't understand why she's not."

How can my 7 year-old child recognize an illegal act, yet the county prosecutor cannot? I can't help but to believe this has to do with her job as an assistant principal at the junior high, her social status, and, yes... her race. As much as I hate to admit it, I truly believe that if this had happened in a different neighborhood, to a minority woman, she never would have been allowed to go home after the initial incident- she'd be in jail.

Little Cecelia had BLISTERS on her tiny body caused from the heat she endured... she BLISTERED!!! And this wasn't the first time she'd left her locked in the car- she was warned several times by her older daughter's daycare and even the police, yet they STILL chose not to charge her. People... come on. How can this not be criminal?

Negligence is defined as "failure to exercise the degree of care expected of a person of ordinary prudence in like circumstances in protecting others from a foreseeable and unreasonable risk of harm in a particular situation." Seems to fit. A person of ordinary prudence would NOT have left their child locked in a car for 8 hours in 95-100 degree weather.

Reckless is "characterized by the creation of a substantial and unjustifiable risk to the lives, safety, or rights of others and by a conscious and sometimes wanton and willful disregard for or indifference to that risk that is a gross deviation from the standard of care a reasonable person would exercise in like circumstances." OK, I can see why this may not fit, because Slaby didn't act with wanton and willful disregard. She didn't purposely leave her baby in the car, so I can see why charges involving "reckless" wouldn't apply.

Endangerment is simply defined as "the crime or tort of exposing others to possible harm or danger." Considering she exposed her daughter to enough heat to cause harm, danger, and death... why doesn't this fit into Ohio laws?? Because in Ohio, in order for you to be considered "endangering" someone's life, you must also be guilty of recklessness, and she's not. SO WHY IN THE HELL DID THE POLICE DEPARTMENT RECOMMEND CHILD ENDANGERMENT CHARGES WHEN THEY KNEW THEY WOULDN'T STICK!!!!

In my mind, this woman deserves more than just her own mental anguish over the death of her daughter. She's still on PAID administrative leave, and won't be criminally charged for killing her daughter. In my world, she'd be in jail, and charged with Negligent Homicide or Involuntary Manslaughter. Her actions caused the death of her child, even if she didn't do it on purpose. I fail to see how that doesn't fit the definition negligent homicide or involuntary manslaughter.

You can read the police report HERE.

Tuesday, September 04, 2007

This is SUCH bullshit.....

Brenda Nesselroad-Slaby won’t be charged in the death of her 2-year-old daughter, Cecilia Slaby, who was left in a car for eight hours amid searing heat Aug. 23, prosecutors said this morning.

Nesselroad-Slaby, 40, forgot she left the sleeping girl strapped in a child seat of a sport utility vehicle at Glen Este Middle School, where she is the assistant principal.

“The only underlying charge appropriate in cases such as this, and the charge suggested by the Union Township Police Department, is child endangering,” said a statement released by Clermont County Prosecutor Don White. “The actions of Cecilia’s mother … were the result of an accident. … It is my opinion that the law dictates that no charges be filed at this time.”

Beyond words, I am. Simply... beyond words.

Beyond words.